How To Ask Women Those
Sensitive Questions
David DeAngelo – author of Double Your Dating ebook [Robrob8's favorite
dating guru]
________________________________________
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave!
I'm finally starting to "get it". It took a long time (lots of e-mails
read, e-book read, cds listened, and seminar attended), but one night it
just clicked, and i'm now starting to get some e-mail/phone numbers. And
i'm getting the tea dates going.
I had one amazing realization today - whenever i DON'T get an initial
meeting after getting the e-mail, i don't do what i used to which is get
depressed, find fault in myself, and figure i'll never get anybody. Now,
since i'm working on this next step of getting the initial meeting, i
just see it as a recipe. Maybe with girl "A" i was too C and not enough
F. Maybe with girl "B" I'm not making her feel comfortable enough of
meeting at my place. I realized that with practice i'll get the "recipe"
right and be able to turn any e-mail into an initial date. That new
mindset has taken a LONG time to get to and it's mostly due to your
info. Thanks!!
Question: Tonight's first date went really well! I was "almost too
comfortable" and was totally calm and cool. Poked fun at her, never
answered any questions directly, and i didn't sit around worrying about
whether or not she liked me. and i could almost tangibly feel the
attraction being amplified!!! But i found out during the date that she's
a single mom. Now, i, personally, don't like to date single moms for
various reasons - not even for a one-night stand. (a lot of guys
disagree and that's cool - this is my own thing). Could you suggest a
way to ask this prior to the first date? Perhaps it's my own limiting
belief, but it seems that by asking this, i'm implying that i'm looking
at her as possible long-term material.
Thanks a lot and everybody reading this: BUY THE CD'S....THEY ROCK!!!
R.
David D. >>>MY COMMENTS:
Well, thanks for the shameless advertising plug... I really appreciate
it.
No, really.
OK, you've asked a VERY interesting question. It's interesting not
because of the content of the actual question... but more because of
what it SAYS about you and what you're thinking.
When you say "Can you tell me how to ask a woman if she has kids before
a first date?" it implies that you think that there's something wrong
with just coming out and asking it.
It's like you're saying "Well, I know that I can't just ASK her if she
has kids... so can you tell me some cool trick to get her to spill it
without me having to ask?".
Well guess what? THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It's not necessary to use trickery when you want to know something about
a woman. If you want to know if a woman has kids, then you need to ASK.
Say "Hey, do you have any kids?".
If she says "Yes", then say "Great. I'm really looking for a woman who
doesn't have any kids, but we can be friends".
Let's use a different example.
Let's say you've placed a personal ad online. Let's say that a cute
woman replies.
Let's say that she sends you a picture... but it only shows her face...
and you're only interested in women who are slim.
Now, you probably would write to me and ask me to give you some slick
way to get her to share how much she weighs with you without having to
ask.
Wrong idea.
Just email her and say "Hey, how tall are you and how much do you weigh?
I really prefer women who are slim. Let me know...".
That's it.
Think about it.
If she IS slim, she'll tell you, and probably be glad that you were up
front with her and direct. If she ISN'T slim, she'll be glad you told
her now and didn't waste her time.
I think that your problem is probably rooted in insecurity, and caring
too much what other people think of you.
...by the way... it's NOT OK to say "Hey, I really HATE FAT CHICKS... so
tell me now, because if you're fat I'm going to bail...".
That's not cool.
If you act like an adult and expect others to act like adults, you'll do
well with women. If you pussy-foot around the issue (a perfect term for
you and this) you'll wind up trying to do things that waste everyone's
time.
If you're up front, direct, and not caring what other people think of
you, then you're going to make women respond more powerfully.
Guaranteed.
Oh, and GREAT JOB getting your act together with women. You're doing
very well, keep it up. And feel free to promote my materials anytime you
want in the future.
If you'd like to improve your self confidence while at the SAME TIME
learning great new skills and techniques to approach, meet, and date the
kinds of women that you've always wanted, then this is the program for
you.
I highly recommend that you get yourself a copy of it...
In my downloadable online ebook "Double Your Dating" I devote almost an
entire chapter to showing you how to improve your self-image and
confidence with women. If you haven't downloaded your copy yet:
Go
download it now.
Feel free to join my
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more 3 times a week. Just sign up
here.
David D.
